Old Snape has a new job

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince: Chapter 8

In the interest of not burying the lead (newspaper lingo), Snape will be teaching Defense Against the Dark Arts.

Is it too late to register? I hope there's not a waitlist.

Take it this year if you want Snape, because hanging on to this job is as impossible as trying to cast a spell without a wand. Let's review previous DADA professors:

• Sorcerer's Stone, Professor Quirrell: That guy was so two-faced.
• Chamber of Secrets, Gilderoy Lockhart: GilLo is still giving out autographs.
• Prisoner of Azkaban, Remus Lupin: Dude was a werewolf.
• Goblet of Fire, Mad-Eye Moody/Barty Crouch Jr.: This was a train wreck in so many ways.
• Order of the Phoenix, Dolores Umbridge: The High Instigator. Enough said.

This was certainly big and surprising news at the year-opening feast. If they all only knew about Snape's meeting a few chapters back with Death Eaters. But as you know from Chapter 2 I think Snape is on the Dumbledore side of magic.

Harry, however, will dread every time he walks into Snape's classroom. If Snape becomes a hero or martyr for the good guys, will Harry's opinion change? Of course, if Snape is a truly dark dude, Harry won't be surprised. He might even feel vindicated.

In the continuing trend of open communication lines, Harry tells Ron what happened to him in the Slytherin car. And Ron again has an adult conversation. As much as things stay the same -- escape from the Dursleys, catching the train to school, Harry finding trouble, Malfoy being Malfoy -- the more they change.

Another happy ending

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets: Chapter 17

This book has been a lot like an NBA game for me. The first three quarters are played to get to the fourth. That's when - if it's going to get exciting - it gets exciting. Maybe it's because it was the second book and the novelty is wearing off or maybe it just moved more slowly and cryptically than the first, but the payoff at the end was worth it. I found myself reading faster than usual.

So I guess from now on I will always suspect that Voldemort/Quirrell/Riddle/????? is behind whatever threatens to close Hogwarts, threatens Harry or anyone close to him, threatens any student or just generally causes mayhem of any sort.

Voldemort's problem is his cockiness. How many times have we seen it in movies when the villian wants to make his prey suffer and delays the deed. Goldfinger could've shot Bond, but he had to elaborately try and kill him with some kind of laser-beam thing. "Do you expect me talk?" asks OO7. "No, Mr. Bond. I expect you to die." And Goldfinger walks out of the room and Bond escapes. The Dynamic Duo did this all the time. It is a fatal flaw for fictional felons. It's not enough for them to kill. They have to make you suffer.

So the Dark Lord (don't get confused with Star Wars here) is revealed to be a former Head Boy at Hogwarts aptly named Riddle, the heir of Slytherin and once again inept at killing his nemesis. When it comes to killing Harry, Voldemort is as inept as GilLo.

BTW, did I laugh when Professor Gilderoy Lockhart de-memorized himself? LOL, for sure on that one. Now he can't take credit for making the school a Voldemort-free zone. Excellent.

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets: Chapter 18

This chapter could've been anticlimactic, but after the Weasley reunion and the usual Dumbledore debriefing and the Hagrid homecoming, we get to see Lucius Malfoy taken down a few notches on his self-importance scale. I think he's trying to make up for not being the heir.

When Harry tricks Malfoy into freeing Dobby, he displays a more observant side to go with his resourcefulness and bravery.

It is nice to know that Dobby really was trying to help Harry. He's no Phoenix, that's for sure, but maybe he will be of more use in the future.

I would tell Harry to enjoy his summer, but that won't be easy where he's headed. Maybe being a Prisoner of Privet will prepare him for the Prisoner of Azkaban.

Going a little batty

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets: Chapter 16

You know how the title track on an album is often not a hit. You will remember it as the album title, but the song itself is completely unmemorable.

Chapter 16 is the title chapter of this book, and it is one I will remember in years ahead when I reflect on this book. That is if I have any brain cells left at the end of this summer reading program. I barely have any functioning as I write this after a long, yet wonderful, day at a Sunday school class cookout. Played my first game of ultimate Frisbee and we won, and these aging legs actually contributed to the victory a time or two. The rest of the time I was waiting for the action to work its way back to me as I tried to pace myself. Believe me, it was a slow pace.

At least I didn't try to run from the fray as GilLo did. I figured he was either a big faker or would unexpectedly come through. He's the worst kind of snake, the big crybaby.

I'm amazed I got the snake thing right about that being the creature of the chamber. Now Harry just has to avoid rolling snake eyes as he takes his next step into what seems to be the true chamber.

Getting there through pipes in a girls' bathroom was certainly unanticipated, but something that odd certainly fits the story.

Harry is on his own again, just as he was when he fought Voldemort/Quirrell for the Sorcerer's Stone. This time he has to rescue Ginny Weasley, who already has a hero-worship thing going on. This could be something straight out of a Batman episode:

"Is this the last hurrah? Will our boy wonder find a way to stop the snake and save the young lass? Or will the snake have him for lunch? Tune in tomorrow - same Potter time, same Potter channel."

Speak Dumbledore, speak

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets: Chapter 10

A lot of words are thrown around that Harry doesn't know because of his Muggle upbringing. It's good that these words have to be explained to Harry because it in turn explains them to me. Git was used to describe GilLo (that's Gilderoy Lockhart for anyone new to this blog), but I had not heard that word before. I asked my daughter Michelle who said, "You could Google it." So she did, and says that a git is a foolish or a contemptible person.

I agree with Ron that GilLo is a brainless git. Either that or he is playing the fool to keep us off guard like Quirrell did. Whatever that case, at least he's somebody to laugh at.

On to more important things. Our detectives get GilLo to get them the potions book, a possessed Bludger nearly kills Harry, Harry catches the Snitch anyway, GilLo is worse than a first-year at fixing Harry's broken arm, Dobby the masochist makes more admissions of guilt and Colin is petrified.

All that to lead us to Dumbledore revealing that the Chamber of Secrets has indeed been opened. I don't think it's a coincidence that he said it so Harry could hear it.

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets: Chapter 11

Allowing GilLo to start a dueling club will undoubtedly go down as one of Dumbledore's poorest decisions. Everything this guy tries sets magic back a thousand years. He should have his wand license revoked and be made Filch's apprentice.

Now everyone knows that Harry is a snake charmer. Seeing him talk to a snake would freak me out almost as much as a black cat following me around the castle would. There's obviously a setup going on to make Harry look like the heir.

Now he's being taken to Dumbledore, who seems to be a true ally for Harry. Maybe Harry will get some answers about the Chamber.

Yesterday I was beginning to get a bit bored with this book, but today was like a good rally in a game of Quidditch. I'm looking forward to the second half.

School's out for the summer

Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone: Chapter 17

So Dumbledore outsmarted them all. Or should I say outmagicked them. He allows the praise to be heaped on Harry and his sidekicks at the banquet, but it was Humbledore's forethought of how to handle the mirror that ultimately stumped Quirrell and Voldemort ... or is it Voldemort and Quirrell.

Every good story has a good conclusion that answers lots of questions, and this one did.

• Snape is not the enemy but not quite a friend.
• Warped thinking is revealed: "There is no good and evil, there is only power ...
  
• Quirrell/Voldemort find Harry to be too hot to handle.
• The manifestation of Voldemort was as creepy as you had hoped.
• Dumbledore has answers, but he keeps the biggest answer from Harry and us.
• Gryffindor wins the cup. It would have been a downer had Slytherin won. The author wants us to put the book down completely happy with the outcome.
• We haven't seen the last of Voldemort in any form.
  

So now Harry gets to spend summer vacation with Dursleys. He will soon think of the school year as vacation despite his plans for Dudley.

I would say poor Dudley, but I won't.

An unexpected conclusion

Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone: Chapter 16

So how is it that three first-year Hogwarts students get past Fluffy and decipher spells and riddles to get at least near the Sorcerer's Stone? That stone is about as well protected as a quarterback with a bad offensive line.

If two heads are better than one, are their three heads really that much better than Fluffy's three heads? Was the trapdoor really the beginning of a trap to snare Harry?

Katie warned me not to turn the page and read the beginning of the next chapter until tomorrow. I intended to heed her warning, but this chapter ends at the bottom of the page. You can guess what happened. I turned the page and saw the words: It was Quirrell. So I won't lie awake tonight wondering who Harry saw. Then again, I don't usually lie awake thinking about anything. It is rare that anything meddles with my ability to sleep during the night or any other time of day. My wife can verify that.

Not sure what it means that Quirrell is in the room, other than he is likely to stutter when Harry asks him why he is there.

So tomorrow I finish the first book and start the second. I plan to write separate posts, plus one about the movie when I get time to watch it.

For now, it's time to work on my to-do list. Somewhere in there, I sense a nap coming on.